Everyone Knew But You

No matter who I was with at the time, if someone asked me if he was the love of my life I had to say, “No, that it was you.” Ohhhh, the looks I got. I was not going to lie. Everyone knew. Everyone but you.

Girlfriends would get together and read pop quizzes from magazines. Who was your first love? It was you. Who would you like to be in love with? It was you. Who would you want to love you? It was you. Who do you love? It was you. It had always been you. And you did not even know. How could you? We had not as yet met.

Have you told him how you feel? No. Why they would ask. I would tell them I was not good enough for you. They did not believe me but that is how I felt. Why would I embarrass myself by telling you how I felt? I had never met you. What could I offer you? I was not pretty or smart. But nonetheless, it was you.

I ran into an old friend a few years ago in a store. We grabbed a coffee and caught up with each other. She asked me if I had met my home. I smiled. I did not answer right away while watching her expression. She could not believe it was still you. I told her we had not connected yet. Still you have not found him she asked. No I replied. He must be with someone and who was I. But still, it was you.

Even my husband, when with a bunch of people and they ask if he is my one true love, I do not have to reply. My husband makes a face and says, No, it’s the person she has not met yet”. Every time my phone rang, he wondered if it was you. All those years. Everyone knew. Everyone knew But you.

How can I hold so much love for someone I have yet to meet. Why do I keep the best of me locked away, waiting for the perfect man. Will we just meet and know without a doubt that we were meant to be together? Will we be able to communicate without words? Will we somehow stumble into each other whether in person or in another way? What if I live the rest of my life looking for my home just to die never finding him, that man that I keep all of the best of me hidden, just for him. Sadly, everyone knew. Everyone knew but you.